Victimization

What does it mean to be a victim? 

I have been a victim of many things:
  • Being held at gunpoint 
  • Attempted rape/Rape 
  • Faulty medical device 
  • Stalking 
You’ll read about the specifics eventually, but the important thing to know is that although I have suffered through these incidents, I am not a victim. Being a victim is a choice. We have the opportunity to choose how we deal with life through the good and the bad. If you feel victimized then you will act as a victim.

What if you had a horrible situation happen to you and you came away from it feeling empowered? How can you retrain your thought process to accept what has happened, recognizing the bad, but keeping your head held high? I don’t know if I know the exact answers. What I do know is I am not a victim!
  • I chose to work in a sleazy bar with a mafia owner who drank too much and brandished his loaded weapon. 
  • I chose to date an ex-con alcoholic drug-addict. 
  • I chose to have breast implants. 
  • I chose to model nude. 
  • I choose how I respond to each event in my life. 
Sure, it would be very easy for me to blame the doctors and the medical device manufacturers for the damage they caused me. What good does that actually do? Does it make me feel better? No! Does it affect my health? Yes! Holding on to those feelings does not allow me to move forward and regain my health. Holding on to the anger for not being able to litigate makes me feel terrible every day. Why would I want that?

I had a fabulous support group of women online who dedicated their time to teaching what they had learned to other breast implant survivors. At first, I wanted to continue to do that as well. I was at the computer one day when I realized that seeing all of these stories over and over again only reminds me of the pain and suffering. I could serve these women better if I walked away from my computer and chose to do whatever it takes to regain my physical health as well as a healthy psychological perspective.

I chose to not be a victim!


Although the events in the book are personal, this isn't my story; it's our story. We've all been there: shamefully sucking-in our tummies to impress others, or using our sexuality to advance our careers because our intelligence or talent come second. Chapters from the book will be released in no chronological order, organically pouring out of me as emotions and memories resurface. Thank you for being here. —Kristen